Saturday, 5 February 2011

Run 45 5th February 2011 The Otter Inn, Colaton Raleigh. Hares: PP and FF

Run number: 45
Date: 5th February 2011.
Point A: The Otter Inn, Colaton Raleigh.
Hares: PP and FF
The hash gathered on a surprisingly warm afternoon at The Otter Inn. After a short while, Man-Pig attempted to call the hash to order. I say attempted, because the pack seemed unable arrange itself into a simple circle – instead creating some kind of ‘blob’ type formation. And taking the hash photo was no easier – with a degree of confusion as to whether we were meant to be looking towards the hedge or towards the camera! To be on the safe side, I understand a photo of each version was taken. Despite the dodgy circle, and the confusion over the photo, Man-Pig decided to get on with proceedings anyway; HIV was nominated RA for the day and I was in the wrong place at the wrong time and ended up being nominated for the words!
By this time, the ‘blob’ had managed to form a shape which, arguably, did at least kind of resemble a circle. Looking around, it was clear that there were a number of A2B virgins in the pack, who were then called to the centre of the circle and asked to say their name and who had made them come. Strangely, despite not being present himself, it seemed that Spockybitz had been responsible for making several of the virgins come!! Whether or not these two points were connected seemed to be a recurring theme of discussion throughout the afternoon!
After a briefing from the hares, the hash started with a check in the pub car park. Eventually, ‘On-On’ was called, and we headed west along a small lane which turned into a track and led to the first long/short split. The pace was already picking up amongst the FRB’s but, being native to East Devon, I had a feeling that the long climb onto Woodbury Common might soon be upon us. And, sure enough, after the long trail rejoined the short trail, it began and I was glad I hadn’t started off too fast.
Soon, we arrived at the first re-group, which was on the edge of Woodbury Common, next to a ford. Once everyone was there, we set off – only to find another re-group about 20 metres further up the track. Another much shorter re-group then took place, before PP and FF told us we were being silly and we’d best carry on! So we did, and soon found the second long/short split.
The longs carried on up the hill, before running back down to join the shorts again. It was then, as we went into Uphams Plantation, that the fun began! It soon became apparent that another hash had recently been in the woods too! Since it was me who had laid the ‘other trail’ for the Otter hash on the previous Thursday, I thought I’d keep a low profile and see what happened. Well, it was chaos! And when I arrived at a junction to discover most of the pack participating in a ‘mass-debate’ about who’s hash they were following, I thought I’d better own up. It turned out that our cunning hares, PP and FF, had been very eco-friendly by recycling some trail, and we soon found our way to the first beer stop. The relief amongst the pack was clear to all to see!
But, there were some hounds missing!......little did we know, further drama was unfolding in the woods! Strongbow and a few others were busy rescuing Soapy (I think!), who was injured, and was being taken to another car park to meet FF in his car. This meant that, after setting up the beer stop, FF had to abandon all the beer and leave it in the ‘responsible’ hands of the pack! A dangerous move, but, fortunately, PP soon arrived to restore some order! Disaster averted!
The hash then continued across the Common, with more eco-friendly trail recycling taking place, before we arrived at the third long/short split. The longs ran a long loop around part of the Common before enjoying the descent to Squabmoor Reservoir car park. Minibar decided to run up and down the hill a couple of times…..well, he didn’t decide to, he just wasn’t looking hard enough for the trail and didn’t see the ‘On’ dot first time around!
We FRB’s then managed to overshoot a very important arrow, which pointed to the second beer stop. I’m not sure how we managed that, because we had That’s Crap with us, who can normally smell these things from a mile away! It seemed that the shorts couldn’t understand it either, because, once FF had eventually managed to get us back to the beer stop, they were ‘mass-debating’ again!......this time about how we’d nearly missed the beer!
Next it was ‘On On’ along the shore of the reservoir to the final long/short split. At this point, it was reported that Two Secs had randomly charged off in a different direction. Why?, we did not know at the time, but it later emerged that she was chasing men on bikes! (not for the first time by all accounts!). In the mean time, the longs were running around the woods near Dalditch Farm, and eventually re-joined the shorts not far from the split.
By this time, I had made up my mind that B was going to be in East Budleigh – but at which pub? We charged down off the Common, and with other FRB’s sensing that B may be close, the pace began to increase again – although, clearly, this was aided by the refreshingly downhill gradient!
Point B turned out to be at the Rolle Arms, which is conveniently located next to a bus stop. Fortunately, for Strongbow, who had forgotten to put a spare pair of shoes in his bag, there wasn’t long to wait for the bus back to point A. However, it was long enough for some of the pack to find the bar….and then to miss the bus!! In the meantime, the majority of the pack waited patiently at the bus stop, which duly arrived on time and was pretty much empty…until we got on! The driver looked somewhat puzzled as to why so such a rabble wanted to get from East Budleigh to Colaton Raleigh at 1620 in a Saturday afternoon! Troy explained as we got on the bus, but to no avail! I think the driver thought we were mad – which I guess could be considered an understandable thought!
As the bus approached point A, it passed Man-Pigs son (Man-Piglet, I think…at least that will do for the purposes of these words because I know no better!!), who had finished watching the rugby and was making his way to the pub. So, as soon as we got back to the car park, Man-Pig jumped in his car to collect Man-piglet and save him the walk down the road. However, while his dad’s back was turned, Man-piglet had clearly managed to thumb a lift as he was sat comfortably in the pub enjoying a pint while wondering what was making Man-Pig take so long to get from the bus stop to the bar!!
Miss Whiplash, I’m told, was nervous about going to the on-down. Unusual for any hasher, but it seems that Miss Whiplash was once banned from The Otter Inn and, being a law abiding person, hadn’t been back since. She snuck in behind some other hashers, and no one seemed to notice!!
Good food and beer was served in the pub – which was a good thing, because it was a long wait for the ‘circle’. I think Paperwork and Sorepoint were being widely blamed for the delay – apparently it was something to do with them ordering the biggest meal ever seen this on side of the Atlantic!
We eventually moved outside for the circle. By which time though, some of HIV’s best laid plans were ruined…….half the people who had ‘earned’ down-downs had escaped – clearly with guilty minds! Despite this the circle proceeded with HIV making it up on the spot! He did a very good job, but I can’t remember who got the down-downs!...other than the hares (for being the hares), possibly Spockeybitz (for only coming to the on-down), and Two Secs (for chasing the blokes on bikes). But there were also others!
Thanks to the hares for an excellent hash over some awesome terrain.
On On!,